Daft.


Nonsense logic everything in life now.


But who cares? No one though.


Always telling myself it's time to let go, stop holding on to something that's not yours.


But it's just so hard that I can't, how.


Things just always happen at the wrong timing, last year too. During the period of my major examination.


In the end, I still have to let go right?


So why not just try to let it all go now and stop letting others hurt you even deeper.


Easy to be said ya.


Whatsoever. Time to let go. Really determined this time round.


It's time to stop letting people hurt you.


So tired of all these shits in life.


Everything should come to a stop, soon, REAL SOON.


Hope I can really survive through this period.


I hope.

Lonely me.

Distance, gaps, do anyone ever notice? I doubt so. 

Relied too much on him, and this is what happen. 

Distanced myself from most of the people from the start of the year, ever since he enter my life again.

I thought he would stay throughout with me this time round, but I was wrong, totally, everything was just a mistake from the start. 

He mean everything to me, but look, what's happening now?

Why does most relationship end up in this manner? I really don't understand. Why?

Is there really a happy ending in relationship? I really hope things end up differently, but, apparently it doesn't. This is just life, isn't it? 

Life's just unfair, isn't it. It is, just face the fact, idiot me.

But, I wouldn't say he's a bad guy though. A guy that changes cause of you, so sweet of him. isn't it? But changed back to his old self after lots of things happen. 

The reason why I just can't let go of him, too much memories stored, too much feelings put in, for the past 4 years. 

If this ever happens to you, what would your decision be? I guess you would end up like me too. 

People change and leave, yet memories stays with you, forever. 

How am I suppose to face all these alone? Or maybe not really alone? There are some friends always there for me, whenever I need them, but how does all these proves that they are really sincere in being there for you? Or is it just putting up a show, just because you regard them as your close friends?

There's only some that i think are truthful i guess? I really don't know. 

Sometimes, it just feels like you have no friends to be there for you, even though there are actually friends around. 

Just some trust issue recently i guess.

Apart from that, studies. How to cope? 

Grades are dropping, studies getting from bad to worse.

And, apparently, I can't seem to find a study buddy. 

Sad life, screwed life, pathetic life, etc.

Everything's just nonsense. 

Nonsense me. 

Time flies. 1 month passed.
To be exact, it's suppose to be 2 months though.

To be honest, I still can't let go, i just can't.

Can see that you're actually leading a good life over there huh, not surprised too. This is just you, isn't it.

Been trying to tell myself to let go, remind myself what have you done to hurt me, but, feelings- memories just can't be forgotten so easily huh. So what should i do? Anyone tell me? Please?

Just one lost sheep in the middle of the mountain. Crying for help but no one ever realise.

I just miss you so much, I miss you even more when I'm suppose to let go. Idiot me.

Some people once mentioned, talking to others might reduce your own burden. But what's the point of telling others when they didn't went through the same situation before? All you get in the end is just pity from them.

So, all I will always do is just keep everything to myself, feeling worse each day. Life is neither peaceful, nor easy. But it still goes on, doesn't it?

If only I own a time machine, I would rewind the time and change everything. But, I will still choose to know you , be with you.

More and more issues piling up, how to settle? Is it coming to an end soon? I hope so.

Depression? Maybe soon it might really happen.

Just so tired.

How to let go.

How to move on.

How to be me again.

A lost sheep in the mountain crying for help.

Redundant.

Care too little, you'll lose them.
Care too much, you'll get hurt.

I still feel so lost. What am I suppose to do?
As always, you disrupted my thoughts.

Why did you do this to me? What have i done to deserve all these treatments from you?

Why. Why. Why.

Since you already decided to leave my side, can you just get out of my mind. Zzz.
Get out of my mind. PLEASE.

I honestly still can't understand what's in a guy's mind? Are all guys similar to you too? How can someone just give up so easily, especially after spending so much time together, 6 months, 5 months to be correct, 1 month of ignorance, after knowing each other for 4 years.

Does all guys behave like a playboy? Changing targets so easily too? Does you people's feeling just fade off so easily? Are you cold blooded?

Such a joke. I'm still so affected by you.

Sometimes, being single is still the best i guess.
Miss being a kid, no troubles, leading such a carefree life.

I'm just so dumb.

Everybody change, You change, I change too.

The old me will never be found again.

June have always been such a bad month for me all along. For continuous 2 years.

Broken promises. Shattered heart.

What's more? How can someone just changed so much within a month? I just don't get it. Is that really all you have got?

Disheartening. Disappointing.

Never trust people easily, never ever trust them with your whole heart, otherwise you will regret at the end.
But, there's no time to regret, What's the point of being sad at this point of time. What can i still say. Who are those that you could actually trust? How do you even know if you can trust that person?

That person you once trust, could be hurting you right now. Just like mine. Those words just came out of your mouth so easily, did you ever think for me before saying it? I doubt so. It's really a mistake, a BIG mistake.

You once trusted him with your heart, and now, he is breaking it like nobody's business.

Me being so silly, hah, trusted you over and over again. But in the end? You make it sounds like everything's my fault after all. Both are at fault alright, in different ways, we are just having different mindsets, just like two people walking in parallel lines, the lines would never ever meet at all.

I suffered, I cried, I did so much for you, but do you even know it?

All i got from you was, "I don't see you making any efforts". Alright, that's hurtful.

Don't know how I should really feel now, so lost, but who will be there for me? I really don't know. One suffering over here, the other having lots of fun over there.

Till now, I still can't fully understand you, after knowing you for 4 years though. A mistake by both of us, again and again. I guess it's really time to let go, really tired of everything. Rephrase, learning to let go even though it's really impossible to do so. I would just blame myself for everything instead, everything's just my fault, my mistake.

A mistake to be me.

Hasn't been very active recently, having a phone seem meaningless when you have no one to text.

One week past, things still seemed unchanged.

Feel so lost whenever someone asked about you.

-What's really happening?
-Why aren't you two chatting anymore?
-Why are you two behaving like strangers at this moment?

Why? Why? Why? So many question asked.

Happy moments? Forever?

Where is it now? I really don't know.

Can it be found once again? I really hope so.

Went back to school last Saturday, afraid I would bump into you. Than I realised it was a full day practice instead of half day. Went to the canteen and i saw you, don't really know how I should feel at that point of time though.

But still feel so happy that I managed to see you.

Hence, all we can do in life is just try to be positive, for our own sake and not for other instead.
Don't expect too much, sometimes it will only lead to disappointment.

Much misses.

It's been long, hasn't it?

A pain to be with or easily forgotten? A recent question asked.

The answer is pretty obvious huh, so, just have to continue to keep myself busy to not over-think things ever again. Just like what was being voiced out to me.

- People who look strong on the outside, doesn't mean they are strong on the inside.
- Don't live to please others
- Stay happy on your own account but not for others sake
- Don't live life with regrets

Lots of things happened, how to resolve it? No one knows it.

After all, what's done is already done, time won't rewind just for one's sake. So, what's the point of thinking or regretting what we have done wrong and hoping things to be undone instead? No point huh.

Might be good at talking some sense to others, but unable to do that to myself. Hah, what's wrong uh.

So, just try to live positively instead i guess? Though its kinda hard, but no harm trying? But, it might not be easy too.

Faking a smile might help too, sometimes. Forcing yourself to smile, acting strong on the outside, etc, might result yourself to feel worse, and even end up crying. So, don't push yourself too hard.

That's all, i guess.